Tips for Mama to Manage Her Emotions
August 26, 2008
We talked about various ways used to manage our stress the past week, and for lack of time I was not able to touch on one method which I often use – getting the stress out on paper and then articulating it out loud to myself.
Some find it helpful to write down their thoughts and their feelings, while others choose to talk to a friend to get it off their chest. Writing it out and articulating helps you process the emotions and thoughts going on in your head. The physical act of saying it out loud or getting them down on paper can help make things clearer and you see the picture in a different light. You are able to see and know why you are upset or understand what that trigger may be so you know how to deal with the source causing you the stress.
So yes, the next time you feel upset, stressed out, depressed, try writing down your thoughts and emotions and reading it out. And if that doesn’t help, make yourself a nice hot cup of tea, camomile will be great and listen to your favourite music and allow yourself some good "me time" or just sit with your eyes closed and enjoy the quietness around you.
And if that still doesn’t help, do any or all of the following:
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Look at photos of your children – baby photos and toddlers photos will do wonders Look through your testimonial file and read a few verses – remind yourself that you have touched lives. That will lighten up your day
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Listen to a recorded tele seminar which you did with your group – the group dynamics and the inter flow of life will energize you
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If you like nature, go for a walk in the park or garden or if you like books, just go browse around some book stores – zoom out of the problem
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Think of something that will bring a smile to your face, keep that smile on for a while – you will feel happier when you smile
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Learn to say "No". Say "No" to the negative voice in your head and tell yourself that you will not allow anything or anyone to control how you feel – take the control back into your hands
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Soak yourself in a warm bath or
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Finish the entire tub of your favorite ice cream / chocolate – guilt free!
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If all else fail, allow yourself to cry; it is therapeutic. Crying is cleansing and it releases chemicals, stress hormones and toxins from your body and so reduces tension. It also increases the body’s ability to heal. You will feel better after crying.
I cannot help but notice the refreshingly clean and cool air after the downpour of rain. So if you need to cry, give yourself permission to cry. It is cleansing and therapeutic. And after you are renewed and strengthend you can go out and face the world again.
Transformation into A New You
August 25, 2008
To all my dear Quantum Leap friends: you will not see me at "Train the Trainer" Program next week in Singapore. That’s only because I have attended the course in Feb and graduated; and yes I made it. I know you will learn many lessons, not only how to design curriculum and deliver it but there will be personal breakthrough, and growth of the inner self. I feel excited for you even as I am thinking about this.
My encouragement to you will be to complete what you have started. It is all too easy for us to want to give up when the going gets tough. We start, we try, and often we give up and we start something new again. Do we wonder why there was no result?
I have been reminded of Blair’s Singer’s teaching on pertubation the past week as I write about transformation and re creation. Indeed as Blair teaches, when we apply pressure past the threshold, we will see a re ordering which evolves into a more complex structure able to handle more pressure. There is no other way to grow than to welcome challenges and difficulties.
If we want to be strong and fit, we need to grow our muscles group. We need to continually add more pressure to what we think we can handle, we want to just push past the threshold. Otherwise the muscles will not have the opportunity to develop and grow. Coal does not become diamond without undergoing intense heat and pressure over time.
We discussed some useful tips on releasing stress in our last tele seminar; we talked of various things that we can do to live stress free lives. However please do not take that to mean that we do not want to have pressure in our lives. Stress and pressure are two different things and I want us to be very clear that I do not advocate escaping pressure.
The fact is that we are all under pressure all the time. We can’t run away from pressure. And if we know that pressure helps us grow and develop, we won’t want to run away from it. The key is in knowing how to manage that pressure or rather how to benefit from having the pressure.
Stand in the heat; believe in yourself that you can go through the fire. Nothing is too difficult for you. All things happen for a reason and that which is placed in front of you now is there for a purpose. Do not fight it, welcome it; let it transform you into a stronger person.
Know that when you have crossed the line, you will not be the same. The process is irreversible. You will not be the same person when you have crossed the threshold; you will be a new you. So welcome the pressure, welcome the change, a new you awaits you on the other side of the threshold.
Be Transformed into A New You
August 20, 2008
What do you do when you are broken and in pieces? The whole is gone, and you find yourself picking up the pieces and trying to somehow put them together again. And what if the pieces do not gel together, and there’s cracks showing? And what do you do when you are crushed and pulverized? How do you glue that together?
Well, perhaps this is where the new re-creation comes in. What if the fine powdered pieces can be rolled, bent, mixed, moulded, reshaped, put to dry and baked in the fire for it turns into something new, fresh and strong? There will be no more cracks and weaknesses but instead an entire new work of art, a re-creation; strong, sturdy, pure and perhaps quite different from the original piece. The imagery of pottery may help here.
There is much value and wisdom in the breaking down in order to build up again. The tearing-down of the old makes way for the making of the new. You can look forward to the new creation that is whole, healthy, fresh, new and strong, able to take pressure and strain and can weather the storms. However two things need to happen. First, the willingness to be rolled, bent, mixed, moulded and reshaped. And secondly; to be put to the fire. It is the fire that leads to a permanent change that increases the strength as the new recreation takes on a new shape and form.
So why cling onto the old when it is not serving us well? Letting go of the old and familiar and comfortable has been frightful and unnatural to begin with. However, if the old is not serving us well, do we still want to cling onto that which is not working? Do we want to make room for the new?
Think in terms of our old belief system, our past conditioning and mindset. Do these support us and empower us or do they hinder and invalidate us? Do they help in creating new possibilities and options; do they bring out the best in us? Then why do we still cling onto them? What good does it do to us to continue in the same way knowing that we will not be getting different results?
Change can be frightful and unpredictable, but change also opens up to new possibilities and options. If we passively accept the present broken pieces and choose to remain in that state then I am afraid noting much will change; we will continue to live with the cracks. However, when we can see the beauty of the new possibilities and its attraction, we want and welcome the change. We want to make room for and plan for that change. And we know that the greater the magnitude and intensity of the change, the stronger is the new work of art. Porcelain has a higher firing temperature than earthenware and therefore a harder surface although both made of clay and water.
So the first step to anything new; a new belief system, a new mindset, a new attitude, new behaviors, a new life style and new possibilities begin with the desire to want to change. And that comes with having eyes of faith and hearts of courage that sees the beauty of the new recreation which is potentially within reach but only if we let go of the old and go for the new.
Will you want to go for the change? And how far are you willing to go? Do you want to remain a cracked pot with the broken pieces glued together or would you rather be a new work of porcelain?
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