Secret To Living Happy And Motivated – Support Your Core Values
April 21, 2010
Core Values And Vision
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The past weeks we have looked at dreaming big and achieving meaningful goals. We have also looked at two different exercises that will help us identify our personal and fundamental values in life.
We do that in order to have more clarity on what we are motivated by. We can then align our decisions and actions to serve these values and live inspired and energized.
Are you serving your core values?
If you have been following my posts, you would have identified your top 3 values by now. Are you ready for the next exercise? This one will show you whether or not you are serving your core values.
Let’s look at your top 3 values and use "time spent" as one criteria to give us a sense of where you are with these values. What amount of time would you want to spend on activities that support each of your core values?
Then based on the past week, chart down the amount of time you actually did spend on each of these values.
For example if family, work and health are your top 3 core values, then based on the last week, how much of your waking time was spent in supporting these top 3 values?
We can take "Family Time" to be time spent being with your family members, doing things together, having discussion or sharing etc.
"Work Time" would include time you take to commute, time spent on the phone or computer doing work after you get home, time spent away from home on work trips etc.
Likewise, you can also decide the "Health" bucket to include time spent on doing groceries for your healthy food, preparing for meals, washing up, time at the gym or time spent meditating etc.
Now compare the two sets of time and see what trend you see.
If the results come as a surprise to you, then what changes would you like to implement?
Let Your Core Values Be Your Compass
Knowing you values is great; yet these values do not show up in your life and are not realized unless you take actions and make corresponding decisions that support them. Having "love" on top of the list is a good start. Not acting on it or working it out will soon takes its toll; this will generate a feeling of guilt. The disconnect between your value and your life will cause the sense of stress.
We do not want to drift through life reacting to the daily “urgent” matters and be caught up in crisis management mode. We do not want to live in the stress zone where life is spent reacting to what is presented to us by the environment. We want to be in control and live with purpose and joy.
I hope you will take a little time to go through these exercises. The clearer your values and the more willing you are in serving these values the more inspired and purposeful will be your life. Let your values be your compass for making everyday decisions.
If you are stressed out or lethargic emotionally and mentally, you can use these short exercise to help you understand how to get back on track and live an inspired, energized and refreshing life again. If you need a little support and coaching, just contact me here. Alternatively, all these tips are discussed at great length in the home study course.
By the way, did you notice how many birds there are on the colorful tree? They somehow manage to "be" together in their colorful world. I wonder how our birds are doing on our tree of happiness …
How Do I Know What My Core Values Are?
April 6, 2010
We talked about having visions aligned with your value.
So how does one know her core values?
Great question. Time for another simple exercise together.
Who is your hero (idol)?
Don't think too much, just name the first person that comes to mind.
Next, ask "What do you admire about him/her?"
Is it her work? Her character? Her contribution?
Again don't think too much, just write it down.
There on your piece of paper you have identified the traits or characters that you admire and and therefore value. These are your core values that you subconsciously cherish and give weight to.
Now you can do this exercise again and ask "Who else do you admire and why?"
Go through and notice if there is any noticeable trend. When you see a few characters or traits recurring, you now know with more certainty the things that you fundamentally value and would like to have in your life (or at least to pursue).
Simple exercise, right? Yet it provides great insight. Now that you know why you admire your hero, I have another question for you. How is knowing your value going to help you in living a more fulfilling and stress-free life?
Check and see if what you do daily are in alignment with developing the values you have just identified. Things you do at work and at home. If your life constantly requires you to be or do things that are contrary to the values you cherish, you are going to suffer tension and pressure pulling you in different direction.
Next step: as we build ourselves up on our core values we want to also look for ways to pass on these values to others around us. When we add value to others' lives, we are going to find strength and vitality to live through tiring and challenging days. There will be a joy in our steps even as we go through trials because we know that the present discipline is worthy of the future prize. Our vision will strengthen us to work towards our dream.
However, when there is a conflict between your values and your work or life; you are going to dislike, even resent the things you do and sometimes the person that you are. There will be frustration and pressure and you are not going to be happy.
So make use of today's exercise and find out a little more about the things that you value in your life. Whether it is a character trait, a thing or a state of being.
Then go live a life of purpose and joy, doing what you like and are passionate about. And any challenges that come your way will not be perceived as dead ends. Instead, you will find the key to overcome the apparent challenges. Try it and experience the fulfillment of living in alignment with your core values.
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Dream Big and Work Hard
March 29, 2010
Dream Big And Take Big Actions
We talked about dreaming big in our earlier post.
When we limit ourselves with self-doubt, and self-limiting beliefs, it will be very difficult to push past what we label as “impossible”.
On the other hand, if we only dream outrageous dreams and not act upon them, we will be disappointed with tattered aspirations and broken dreams.
Let’s try another exercise today.
Let’s take a piece of paper and draw three columns for your dreams. List down dreams under the ‘I Can Accomplish’ column. Then work on the ‘I May Be Able To Accomplish’ column and the ‘I Don’t Know How I Can Accomplish’ column.
First column should be easy; you can write down previous accomplishments and those you are confident of achieving.
Second column may require some thoughts.
Then take your red marker pen, cross out the current title for the third column and write ‘What I Need to Do to Accomplish My Dreams
When you phrase it this way, you are inviting your mind to give you options. These challenging dreams now become possible endeavors. Instead of shutting them out from your sphere of possibility, you are now opening up new opportunities that you can conquer.
What’s stopping you from achieving your dreams?
What can you do to overcome these barriers?
You may be surprised at what you come up with for the third column. You will find that the dreams you thought impossible are achievable with actionable steps. And the impossible begins to seem possible.
You do not need to limit your imagination; nor subdue your passion. Aim high, and start working towards that goal step by step. However, try not to set a goal that you are not willing to work hard towards. Unrealistic goals will only disappoint you.
Was it Thomas Edison that said genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration? For one to accomplish his dreams, there has to be had work and discipline. And that 1% has to do with thinking big.
There is no growth unless you stretch yourself. Life is all about growth. Challenge yourself once in a while; get out of your comfort zone. Do something you do not dare to do (within moral and ethical limits) and feel your own potential.
When I feel discouraged and uncertain, I go learn something new. I remember a time when I was going through a rough patch. I had wanted to withdraw and be invisible.
Then I thought the best way to counter that is to face my fears and get out of my well drawn comfort zone.
I had always loved the water and wanted to dive so I can weave among the corals and swim among the myriad of fish up close. But the thing is I am rather myopic and with astigmatism; I can barely see without my glasses. And I am dead scared of the cold. I sneeze like 19 times every morning. And if I were to learn to dive before I leave Sydney, I would need to do it in the winter as my project was coming to an end then.
Well you know the rest of the story. I signed up for class, went for the training and got myself certified. It was very empowering to be able to work towards that goal. Once I got over the mental battle, I looked forward to the pool sessions and going out into the open sea in the early mornings.
It was such a wonderful experience. Apart from having a blast I out grew my unfounded fears and became a different person. And amazingly that power and confidence translates to other areas of my life.
And when you achieve one dream it will fuel you to move towards other dreams with greater certainty. So dream big and ask yourself what skills you need to learn and what new knowledge you need to acquire in order to work towards your dream. In other words, what is your next step? Then just do it! Action is the only thing standing between you and your dream!
If you need a little help in mapping out your dreams and your “how to steps”, just write in for a strategy session and start working on achieving your dreams.
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