Moon Cakes To The Rescue
October 1, 2009
The moon is at its fullest and roundest during the Mid Autumn Time, ie the 15th day of the eighth month of the lunar calendar. This is roughly the same time as the autumn and spring Equinoxes of the solar calendar. Farmers celebrate the end of summer harvesting during the Mid Autumn Festival in ancient days.
The roundness of the moon symbolizes reunion for the Chinese and the family usually gather together during this festive time. In some countries public holiday is declared to celebrate the Mid Autumn Festival.
When I was younger, we would have moon cakes (sort of fruit cake made with lotus seed paste or red bean paste as filling with nuts and salted egg yolks), steam yam and pomelos after dinner out in the veranda as we look up to the sky and appreciate the roundest, brightest moon. I would marvel at the stars and the constellations and would have many questions. And we will chat and played with our hand-made lanterns under the moonlight night.
Moon cakes take center stage during the Mid Autumn Festival besides the lanterns. As legend has it, the common moon cakes helped bring about the revolution of the Han Chinese against the ruling Mongolians.
A Han rebel devised a scheme to over throw the Mongolians by putting messages inside the round moon cakes and passing these to friends far and wide under the pretext that these are to honor the longevity of the Mongolian Emperor. The message embedded in the moon cake has the plan and the date to fight against the Mongolians. On the 15th of the eight month, the uprising over threw the Mongolians and ended the Yuan Dynasty (as legend has it).
It’s a wonder how creativity has made use of something quite plain and ordinary to achieve great things. No wonder it is said that desperation breeds creativity! I wonder if you are faced with any sense of desperation or limitation today? Or would you be seeking to accomplish something? Perhaps the hunger for success will grant you the creativity and the force to conquer your fears and limitations.
Walk down China Town today you will notice new varieties of modernized moon cakes. Yes we even have "iced-skin" moon cakes (best kept cold in the fridge) and chocolate moon cakes (where East meets West). It just goes to show that creativity is still put to great use!
If you have a moment this season you may want to take a look at the moon and the stars and listen to the messages they have for you. The entire universe is alive with lessons to teach and guide us, when we open our ears and listen with our hearts.
Mid Autumn Festival or full moon means harvest and thanksgiving to some and reunion to others. This season, I will be lifting my eyes to the moon. And I know that my family members in faraway lands will be looking at the same moon and enjoying the same blessings. And they will know that "somewhere out there beneath the bright moon light, someone’s thinking of you and sending you lots of love tonight …"
Internet chats and video conferencing will not take the place of messages sent through nature. May nature speak to you in creative ways, everyday.
Have a wonderful Moon Cake or Mid Autumn Festival and long live creativity!
21st Century 3G Families
July 16, 2009
A friend of mine recently joined the face book bandwagon and asked me how this thing works. I said to ask her son to configure it for her with privacy settings. That sets off a whole conversation on the young and budding son …
The son, apparently will come home really late and probably not want to configure this for mom nor spend time explaining how this thing work.
I am in the midst of preparing for 2 presentation this weekend. One on building relationship between parents and children. And the other on how to live in a 3G family – in an Asian setting.
3G family refers to three generations living together under one roof.
What picture comes up as I mention that?
How so you feel?
A little excited maybe?
One can imagine the challenges of maintaining peace and sanity in such a tension packed enviroement. There are relationships issues on all sides; between the children and parents, the in-laws staying together on long term, the grandchildren and the grand-parents. And depending on your position in the family, this can be challenging to different degrees.
Getting into each other’s way will be a big issue. One needs space, personal space, a rather foreign concept to Asian culture where everything is communal. Mental, spiritual and physical space is needful. And think of the combination of relationship issues here: parent and child, husband and wife, in laws, grand parents – that can be a bundle of joy or headache!
How do you maintain space?
You want to set a boundary. You want to let others know what is ok and within limits and what is not. Others will not know without you articulating it. Although we assume that others "should know better" and honestly we are just afraid to voice it out at times. But what is the cost of not doing that? You end up feeling invalidated, weakened when boundaries are crossed over.
You need to define and hold the space for yourself. You will let others know if and when they crossed the line. Although you will get into each other’s way physically often enough, the emotional pressure is the hardest to manage. Find your voice, no matter how small.
Do you sometimes feel guilty for standing your ground and holding your space? Some characters are just stronger and all are at differnt stages of growth. Be a support to others and you want to protect and take care of yourself.
You want to respect others’ boundaries too. When they say no, you do not insist, or proceed. You embrace diversity in beliefs, in ways of handling daily issues, or differences in character and mentality. That I think is the basis of a strong family bond. Your give preference to others.
Love is too loosely used a word, I like to see it from the angle of respect for each other. Putting the other before you, in thoughts and words and deeds. I have heard so many conversations where one party dominated the entire course without wanting to listen. It is so draining and sets up a downward spiral.
What would be the picture if we each learn to take a step back and listen, instead of being too eager to advise and teach?
So it is great to cherish your family while you have them. It is also good to be able to stay together if you want to experience a 21st century 3G family. However, do be mindful to respect others and in setting up and observing boudaries, yours and others. You want to set yourself up for success and not stress, protect and take care of your family
I wonder how you manage these family tensions. Would that be something you like to see more of here?
So as I sign off and get back to work on my presentation for this weekend remember that you need to respect yourself before you can respect others. So set your boundaries and then cherish the time you get to live together. Focusing on the positives and good things will also help, that always reliefs stress.
Leave your comment, share your thought.
Are You Empowering Your Light?
June 30, 2009
When was the last time you wake up early to watch the morning sun rise?
I sometimes wake up at 5am as I enjoy the freshness of the morning. That’s when I am still and quiet to listen to my inner voice and the voice of the Spirit.
Apart from hearing the happy chirps of the birds, I also get to see he changing colors of the morning sky. Then the awakening of a new day!
When the first shy ray breaks into morning light; darkness fades away unnoticeably and a new day dawns. And I am energized to start a new chapter. I get to compose the rest of my story my way.
I get to decide how I want to live this day.
I can choose to be productive and happy or I can choose to procrastinate
and look for excuses to justify my inactions.
Sometimes these excuses can even sound very noble and convincing.
I get to decide how I want to live this day.
I can face my issues or I can convince myself that there really isn’t any concerns.
I can choose to take action on my plans or I can allow my negative self talk to take me out of the game before I even start.
What will you choose today?
You can either empower yourself and take responsibility for your own choices or
You can dis-empower yourself by making yourself a victim of circumstances.
And do you sometimes even start taking responsibility for others’ action?
That definitely disempowers.
If that is happening then it is time to release yourself of the unnecessary burden.
You can only take responsibility for your own actions, not others.
There is no need to beat yourself up unnecessarily.
We are all responsible for our own actions and decisions whether you acknowledge this or not.
Take control of your own thoughts, feelings, and action today and let others be responsible for their own choices.
Empower yourself and let you light shine.
At the end of the day, will your light sustain or will darkness prevail?
I guess the choice is up to you.
For more stress-relieving tips, you can get a free 7-part e-course here.
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